Webb, N.
2e Newsletter
July 2006
This article written by Nadia Webb, PsyD, ABPdN, discusses three categories of 2e children whose disabilities and/or giftedness that is likely to remain unrecognized or misunderstood.
Three “Usual” Categories of Twice-exceptional Children
- Children who are recognized as gifted but whose learning disabilities are missed and who go untreated. These children are able to thoroughly compensate through creative strategies and sheer intellect so that their difficulties never appear on anyone’s radar. In some cases, these difficulties might come to the fore as the child matures. For example, dyslexia can become more apparent in the later grades as the reading demands increase. When the child’s performance falters, however, rather than considering the possibility of dyslexia, schools tend to reconsider the giftedness label.
- Those whose learning disabilities are severe enough to be noticed but whose giftedness is overlooked. These children may receive learning disability services but not opportunities for advanced academic work, and their areas of accelerated talent may be ignored.
- Children in whom gifts and disabilities blend, each essentially negating each other. These children appear average but are often performing well below their potential. The children in this group are rarely identified as either gifted or learning disabled.
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According to Brody and Mills (1997) there are three categories of children whose disabilities and/or giftedness are likely to remain unrecognized or misunderstood. Children in each of these categories (see the sidebar) possess a mix of giftedness
and learning disabilities. Children in all three categories present a particular challenge to the school system because they can straddle both ends of the bell curve simultaneously. Addressing 2e children’s deficits may mean neglecting their strengths and vice versa. Moreover, these children present an exceptional set of risks, difficulties, and opportunities to schools and parents alike.
Based on my experience in my practice, I believe there’s a fourth category of children whose gifts and deficits go unrecognized and unaccom-modated in schools. In this category
are kids with the sorts of behavioral problems that make a difficult situation far worse and that result in the children getting labeled as “bad kids.” In this article I’ll give special attention to these children, issues surrounding their teenage years, and possible
strategies for addressing these issues.
Behavior Problems in Teens
When dealing with gifted children, it’s easy to forget that the area of the brain responsible for planning, judgment, delayed gratification, and impulse control is the last to mature. This process typically takes place between the ages of 16 and 20. Even
more than their peers, 2e teens face significant challenges and frustrations, and they often make poor decisions in how they respond.
The literature is pretty clear that children with attention deficit disorders and/or learning disabilities are at greater risk for substance abuse, particularly if they aren’t identified and treated. The child who loses homework, misreads the assignment, leaves his book at school, gets another D+, cuts class to avoid reading aloud, and doesn’t work up to his potential, becomes the teenager who finds it a relief to hang out under the bleachers
with the other kids who cut second period. Unless these teenagers have guidance and support, they may drift into settings where the expectations are low and peers expect nothing of them other than a willingness to tolerate bad behavior.
Behavior like this should not be regarded as a normal part of adolescence. Rather, it’s a billboard-size warning. These are children who are disproportionately struggling with neurological injuries, attentional and learning impairments, or emotional and personality problems. They have typically overwhelmed their teachers and parents, and are running out of chances to be turned around.
Parents often avoid confronting the problem, hoping that it’s simply immaturity. Schools refuse to deal with the issue. A teenager identified as a drug user is unlikely to be identified as either gifted or 2e because any weak academic performance is attributed
to drug use. In addition, with a school’s zero-tolerance policy on drugs, it means that a child’s history of drug use can’t be mentioned to school personnel without risking the child’s expulsion. That makes it hard to provide support for teens who are seeking honest,
thoughtful conversation about the difficult topics of adolescence. In cases where bad decisions have been made, not smart doesn’t mean not gifted. Gifted children are often remarkably talented at putting all of their formidable will towards counterproductive ends.
How Parents Can Make a Difference
Parenting style matters most when children are struggling academically. Studies have shown that underachieving children improved when their mothers reacted to the child’s
struggles in an encouraging way and helped the child think through ways to solve the problem. But underachieving children took a turn for the worse when their mothers reacted by taking over the task themselves or punishing children for not performing well. Drs. Eva
Pomerantz and Martin Seligman, who did much of this research, suspect that underachieving teens hear so much about their failures at school that they need parents to help them build confidence in their abilities. Parents can also help them internalize the skills they’ll
need to tolerate adversity and challenge.
Confidence is built on the experience of genuine accomplishment and success, often in the face of self-doubt, boredom, difficulty, frustration, and moments of pleasure. All the
awards, ribbons, plaques and pats on the back mean little if they don’t feel earned. For teenagers, a core area of accomplishment is learning basic life skills. Teenagers are often receptive to chores if they are aware of their relevance to adult life. Parents can teach
their teens to balance a checkbook, do laundry without dying everything pink, and cook three meals worthy of serving to a date. Teenagers also need help in learning that reciprocity and mutual care is part of being an adult. They need to practice life skills now, while there is a parental safety net. Your job as a parent is to make yourself obsolete.
Some Parenting Tips
Here are some simple ways for parents to help:
- Teach your children that courage is often found in carrying out the day-to-day challenges such as doing something new or difficult, risking mistakes, and facing personal areas of weakness and disability. “Domestic” courage shouldn’t be undervalued.
- Recognize that some children need help in taking on more autonomy, while others are certain that they have it all figured out and that parental restrictions are obstacles to be overcome. Sometimes the real obstacle is arrogance.
- Listen to your teen. Often preventing problems means creating a climate in which kids know that they don’t have to manage it all on their own and they can talk about difficult issues. Open up communication before there is a problem. If the channel is already
established, there is less of a barrier.
- Seek help when it’s needed. Ask for guidance and help from a mental health professional if underperformance, depression, anxiety, or perfectionism are issues. Ask for a tutor or time from a teacher
if your teen is struggling and there is no improvement.
- Consider that maybe the teacher is right. Sometimes it can be hard to hear criticisms about our children, but experienced, observant
teachers have had the chance to see hundreds of fourteen-year-olds.
They often have a better yardstick than parents simply because of
the sheer numbers of children they’ve seen over the years. Also keep
in mind that teenagers are pretty good at “information management.”
You may not have received all the information you need.
- Remember that teachers of 2e kids should be treated like heroes. These kids are high maintenance. If you are asking a teacher to
decipher her hieroglyphics, or spend lunch at her desk so that your
child can have extra time to finish a test, or type up lecture notes
ahead of time so that your son has a copy, consider also being a parent who goes beyond the job description. Some of the families I work with come bearing gifts – things like banana bread, coffee mugs or tiny baskets with soaps or candles. I am convinced that one of the reasons families like these are so successful is that everyone working with this child is helping “the banana bread family.” Who wouldn’t want to help such nice, thoughtful people? The parent who tells you how you ought to do your job, and then wants you to spend lunch at your desk, on the other hand....
- Encourage intellectual risk taking. Bright teens often mistake a 4.0 for an education; they avoid making mistakes rather than pursuing the challenges that will stretch and nourish their abilities. This is one of the reasons why so few young prodigies go on to become accomplished adults. While it is a noble ambition to find the direct life trajectory, being in the “major of the month” club is often a normal part of adolescent development. One of the tasks of adolescence is to identify consolidations, which they do by trying on different identities to see how they feel. This is why your preppy teen comes home one day with a nose ring and a reggae collection.
- Bear in mind the definition of a psychologically healthy act that Hans Selye came up with in 1932: “If it doesn’t hurt you, doesn’t hurt anyone else, and you enjoy it, it is fine.” Most piercings will heal with little remaining evidence, and hours spent in front of a computer only matter if they come at the expense of developing passable social skills and a life that isn’t entirely virtual.
Surviving the 10th-Grade Crisis
In my practice, I’ve found that children come for testing in waves, usually driven by peaks in parental anxiety. Underachieving during ninth grade is often written off as transitional jitters. Tenth grade matters to college admissions committees and, therefore, to parents. As one of my mentors puts it, “No one wants their place in Heaven determined by their deportment as a mid-adolescent”; but it does seem to determine one’s place in college.
Some things to keep in mind about the 10th grade are:
- Admissions committees notice when teenagers “catch fire.” It matters most that they find something that sparks them intellectually and that it shows in their work. Having sat on an admissions committee, I’ve seen the applications of many earnest, hard working teenagers. However, there are those kids in each batch who make it in because they inspired someone to champion them.
- High school can be a mix-and-match process. If an assessment supports the need for it, gifted children can be accelerated in particular classes, home schooled for part of the day, take a distance learning class, or have dual enrollment in college and high school for part of each day. The goal is to help them spark, and to give them the skills to tolerate the difficulties along the way.
- College classes are often treated preferentially. Some colleges round up grades for AP or college classes by a full grade, pulling up a GPA quickly for teens who have struggled academically in the past.
- SAT review classes are often a great review for kids who have missed classes because they were there “in body only,” or if they have had erratic exposure to typical high school material because of acceleration, home schooling, or travel.
- If grades are truly awful, time off from school might help. Time
spent working or traveling can often jar teenagers from their
self-absorption, plus it gives them another year of neurological
maturation. Another option is attending a community college and applying to a four-year college as a transfer student.
- Be aware that unless a child’s scores on formal testing are below
the 10th percentile, the company that administers the SAT is often
unresponsive to requests for modifications, particularly to requests
for extra time. Approval of testing accommodations requires two
things:
- An IEP offering comparable accommodations needs to be in place for at least six months.
- Neuropsychological or educational testing that shows evidence of impairment.
Conclusion
The good news is this: college is a much more inviting place for 2e students than high school. For many, college is the refuge they’ve been seeking their whole lives – a place
where their creativity, drive, and talents are given freedom to fly, unencumbered by the bureaucracy and hoop-jumping of secondary schooling.
Colleges are unfazed by 2e children. In fact, it may be the first time that these kids are seen as normal. Parents and students may find it heartening to look at some of the websites for Ivy League colleges. Harvard, for example, offers the following to their 2e students: diagnostic testing services, note-taking services, oral tests, readers, tutors, books on tape, reading machines, tape recorders, videotaped classes, untimed tests, a learning center, a resource center/clearinghouse, and modification of the requirements
for graduation.
Much of adolescent misbehavior is caused by boredom. Accelerating students to a sufficient level of challenge often improves their behavior dramatically. Children often rise to the challenge, particularly if they have parents in their corner who can coach them through.
References
Brody, L.E., & Mills, C.J. (1997). Gifted children with learning disabilities. Journal of Learning Disabilities, 30 (2), 282-297.
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