This article is adapted from Davidson Institute’s “Mentoring Guidebook”, part of our collection of free guidebooks for gifted and 2e families. For a deeper dive into supporting your gifted or twice-exceptional child, we encourage you to explore the full guide.
Mentorship can be a valuable experience for gifted students, providing opportunities to explore interests, develop skills, and connect with someone who can offer guidance and encouragement. This section answers common questions about finding and building a successful mentorship relationship, from establishing expectations to navigating challenges.
What is a mentorship?
Torrance (1984) defines a mentorship as is a formal relationship between a student and a professional adult to further the student’s knowledge, skills, or career. The relationship should develop over time to be close and individualized. It should also be characterized by mutual caring, depth, and response. A mentor is a creatively productive person who teaches, counsels, and inspires a student with similar interests.
Why is mentoring important?
According to a study of presidential scholars from 1964-1968, Kaufman (1981) reviewed the benefits that come from having a mentor, including gaining a role model, support and encouragement. These presidential scholars also stated that the best mentors set an example, offered intellectual stimulation, and communicated excitement and joy in the learning process.
As noted by Gallager (1985), with mentoring, students can find direction, mature, and focus on the future by associating with someone who has not just been there and done that, but has succeeded. Mentors can have a profound effect on guiding a student through the often-difficult formative years.
Berger (1990) observed by sharing time, talents, and experiences, mentors and students can develop close relationships in which both parties collaborate and learn from one another. Often mentors and mentees view one another as friends and colleagues rather than a student and teacher.
According to Ambrose, Allen, and Huntley (1994), the mentor relationship can be equally as valuable for mentors, who learn more about giving from the heart and appreciate the positive impact they provide to blossoming students. Mentors find value in nurturing a young person with the potential to make a difference in the world.
Mentoring is important to students not only for the knowledge and skills learned, but also for the professional socialization and personal support needed to facilitate success in the field and beyond.
What do mentors and mentees do together?
While often mentors and mentees work on a specific project together, the relationship does not have to be defined by that project. Mentors and mentees can talk to each other not only about past experiences, goals, plans, and skills, but also about the mentor’s career path and useful problem-solving strategies. They can attend meetings and conferences together, and exchange and discuss written materials. Mentors and mentees may often interact with other individuals who may be of help to the mentee.
Do you have to be in the same location as your mentor?
Co-location is not crucial for a mentoring partnership. There have been many successful mentorships that have taken place during set times over the telephone or over the internet via either email or instant messaging.
Will mentoring require a large amount of time?
The duration and consistency of a mentoring relationship is a deciding factor in its success. Because the venue of a mentorship varies between in-person mentorships, cybermentorships, or telephone-mentorships, expectations need to be established at the beginning of the relationship so both parties can adjust their schedules accordingly. There are a lot of creative suggestions out there regarding a mentorship. It is not unheard of for mentors to fit meetings into their lunch breaks or even use instant messaging as a communication tool.
What happens if the mentorship match isn’t working to either party’s satisfaction?
Unfortunately, you may discover the mentorship match is not quite a perfect pairing; either there is no common ground, or the mentor and mentee don’t actually hold the same interests like initially thought. In this situation, you can politely and respectfully explain the circumstances, and perhaps ask your mentor if he/she feels comfortable assisting you in locating another individual whose expertise may be more helpful for your particular interest. If things do not work out, you may have to begin your mentor search again.
Why is a mentor hard to find?
Finding a dedicated and interested mentor is key to a successful learning relationship. Exactly what the potential mentee desires should be made clear in the initial contact with a potential mentor. This desire will most likely indicate a significant time commitment, and because most mentors also work a full-time job, they may not be able to balance the needs of a mentorship with other professional or personal obligations.
What are some problems that can occur in a mentorship?
A problem often encountered in the beginning of a mentorship is the lack of clear objectives on the part of the mentee. Not enough time devoted to the relationship is another common problem; unreasonable expectations of each other or one member taking unfair advantage of the other member can also be problem areas. Unfortunately, sometimes there is a general lack of mentoring skills on the part of the mentor, mentee, or both.
How can these problems be prevented or resolved?
From the very beginning, both parties of the mentorship should aim for realistic, focused goals. The two parties should make these goals and expectations clear to one another and maximize their time together and apart by using the phone, e-Mail, and other timesaving strategies.
Who should manage the relationship?
The mentee should manage and set the goals for the relationship. After all, it is the student’s development that is primarily at stake. That is not to say that the mentor does not have any input, or that the student’s parents need not play their expected, responsible role; however, the mentee must be the one who takes responsibility for the process and outcomes.
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